Wonder Woman: Now with pants!

If you're going to read superhero comics without your brain exploding, there are certain things you have to just accept without question. Like, how no one ever notices that Clark Kent looks exactly like Superman, if Superman put on glasses. Or that the Batmobile never gets stuck in traffic. Or that superheroines hate wearing pants. Or, really, clothes in general.

If you were to start questioning that last one, you'd probably realize that there's absolutely no good reason for a woman to fight crime in a swimsuit. None. Whatsoever. And, in fact, a million reasons not to. Basic common sense and safety concerns aside, you have to figure that in real life, it wouldn't be an especially flattering look. I think Keith Giffen's classic Justice League run is the only comic book to ever tackle the issue of superheroine cellulite, when Guy Gardner suggested to Ice that if she was going to wear such a revealing costume, she should start jogging to avoid "thigh cheese." It was a watershed moment.

(If that strikes you as a tad sexist, A) Welcome to the comic book industry, and B) A couple of years later, Giffen followed that up with a story where Blue Beetle really let himself go and wasn't able to fit into his costume. So at least Giffen was an equal opportunity offender.)

Anyway, DC Comics has announced that in Wonder Woman #600, out tomorrow, Wonder Woman is getting a new costume. Specifically...pants.

I generally hate it when comic books mess around with classic costumes to this degree. It just seems sacrilegious, somehow. Hell, I'm still annoyed about that period in the 90s when Superman had shoulder-length hair. Fucking hippie.

But honestly? I really dig the new costume. It's a fantastic design by Jim Lee. Which is actually a little surprising, considering that as insanely talented as he is, he hasn't always shown the best judgment in this regard. I haven't been this jazzed about an iconic superhero costume being updated since...well, since DC finally gave Robin pants, I guess.

The reason for this change is being credited to the new storyline kicking off tomorrow, but I'm guessing there's another motivation. Warner Brothers is again trying to make a Wonder Woman movie, and it'll be hard enough to get a decent actress to star in it without also having to convince her that running around in a swimsuit would be good for her career. I mean, Lynda Carter more than pulled the look off, but it's not like she went from Wonder Woman to an Academy Award, either. So now, the filmmakers can use this costume and not have geeks lose their shit that they took liberties with the comic. I mean, don't get me wrong, they'll still lose their shit. But because this is now canon, they'll grudgingly accept it. Probably. Maybe.

Of course, there's no way this change isn't temporary. Wonder Woman's costume is too iconic--and more importantly, featured on too much merchandise--for DC to just toss it away. Plus, you can never underestimate fanboy outrage. If a boycott of the series hasn't already started, I'd be shocked. Sooner or later, the old look will make a comeback.

But until then, Wonder Woman can fight crime and finally not have to worry about chaffing. I'm not sure if that counts as feminism or not, but with comic books, that's about as close as it gets.