Dating for D.C. Dummies

About a month ago, I was putting some stuff on Craigslist one night and checking out the personals section. One [ad] caught my attention. It said she wanted to learn something about plants. I was like, That's my job; why not? [It wasn't a perfect match, but] I don't want to meet someone that likes 100 percent of the things I like. [When I found out it was Date Lab looking for a match for someone,] I thought, Sure, I'm up for it. (Date Lab)

Craigslist? That's how Date Lab finds its date fodder? I had no idea.

I don't know why this surprises me as much as it does. It makes sense, I guess. I suppose I just assumed that there was some Washington Post super computer that scanned each application and compared them for potential matches. Or a team of highly trained psychologists who sat around each day, debating about who to set up with who. Or some really bitter divorcee who sabotaged the process by intentionally pairing up people with no chemistry whatsoever.

Craigslist. Wow. Talk about shattering illusions.

I didn't know that [a personal ad] was one way The Post looked for people. I got kind of weirded out at that point. I wouldn't want to date someone who looks at the personals.

Look, I'm not going to defend looking for a date on the Craigslist personals. But if you sign up for Date Lab, do you really have the moral high ground?

Patricia: I'll [give it a] 3. He was polite and really considerate, but I'm not attracted to him. I was really scared he was going to expect a kiss on the cheek or something. I just was not feeling that. But we had a hug. It was quick, not awkward. I thought he might offer to walk me to Farragut West Metro. It's in the opposite direction, and he had to fly out [the next morning,] but that [he didn't] was kind of weird to me.

I'm of two minds on this one. Yes, he probably should have offered to walk her to the Metro. But it's Farragut West. We're not exactly talking about the Petworth station. What's the worst that could have happened to her? Some homeless guy might have asked her for change? She might have run into a dangerous shoe sale? She could have tripped and fallen into a Starbucks and gotten a craving for a Gingerbread Latte? Come on...

And he never once talked about plants. I was waiting to hear, What's on the trellis? What kind of ivy is that? But he never mentioned it.

This ties directly into my theory from a couple of weeks ago about how male geeks have learned to initially hide their geekdom from women. Well done, Adam. I honestly can't think of a less cool thing for a man to say to a woman than, "What's on the trellis? What kind of ivy is that?"

But more to the point, she'd already admitted to him that she wasn't really interested in plants. So why criticize him for getting the hint? If I'm out with a girl and she says that she's not interested in comic books, I'm not going to follow up by asking her who she thinks would win between Batman and Spider-Man.

(The answer's Batman, by the way.)

Adam e-mailed Patricia, but they didn't talk again. "There was no real romantic chemistry. I think we both knew that," says Adam. Patricia says she was too busy to keep in touch but adds, "I hope he's doing well."

Weak. If you don't want to communicate with the guy, fine. But don't say you're "too busy" to answer an email. No one in D.C. is too busy to respond to email. It's what they live for.