Best and Worst of 2011: Movies

Best:

5) Attack the Block

I was a bit distracted in the first hour because when you see aliens attacking London, you naturally expect The Doctor to show up. But once I got over that, I really dug this film. The fact that the filmmakers were able to create such distinctive, scary aliens on what couldn't have been a huge budget, made this even more impressive.

4) X-Men: First Class

By all rights, this should have sucked. X-Men 3 was pretty awful, and no franchise has ever rebounded by going the prequel route. But First Class manages to pull it off, thanks to a surprisingly great script and some even better performances by actors who probably had better options than an X-Men film.

3) Crazy, Stupid, Love.

Wow, Ryan Gossling has an amazing body. Wait, what? Who said that? Anyway, I wish I'd seen this in a theater instead of DVD, as there's a fantastic twist (maybe the best one since The Sixth Sense) and I'm pretty sure there would have been an impressive gasp from the audience. Almost as impressive as Ryan Gossling's abs...

2) The Muppets

An unfortunate part of getting older is that fewer and fewer things can make you feel like a kid again. The Muppets succeeded beyond my wildest expectations. Seriously, it'll be virtually impossible to act like a cynical asshole for at least a little while after seeing this.

1) The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo

I thought the mystery and its resolution were a bit unsatisfying, but the characters, the acting, the directing, and even the opening credits, are all so outstanding that it's easy to overlook it. Almost as amazing is the fact that if I've historically had three turn-offs when it comes it comes to women, they're A) Tattoos, B) Body piercings and C) Emaciated bodies. Yet I found Rooney Mara's Lisbeth to be super hot. Almost as hot as Ryan Gossling.


Worst:

5) Sucker Punch

The most self-indulgent piece of crap by a director since Lady in the Water. It looks nice visually, and I guess there's a seed of a good film hidden somewhere in Sucker Punch. But it's not worth sitting through to find.

4) Green Lantern

If ever there was a superhero made for this CGI-heavy world, it's Green Lantern. This should have been two hours of pure eye candy. Unfortunately, the movie is dragged down by a dull, unimaginative script and a horribly miscast Ryan Reynolds.

3) Season of the Witch

Maybe the Nicholas Cage-iest Nicholas Cage film ever. I know the guy is bankrupt, but it can't be that bad. Just make another National Treasure film, dude.

2) Battle: Los Angeles

Occasionally, I'll be watching an otherwise crappy Syfy original movie and think, "You know, if this had a bigger budget and better actors, it might actually be pretty good." For all intents and purposes, Battle: Los Angeles is a Syfy original movie with a big budget and great actors, and yet it's still horrible. So much for that theory. It doesn't even have the simple decency to provide an actual ending.

1) Red Riding Hood

Typically, even the worst movies have some sort of redeeming quality, no matter how small. A clever line of dialogue. A cool car chase. Gratuitous nudity. Red Riding Hood manages the fairly remarkable feat of having nothing. It's an embarrassment to all involved, especially Gary Oldman, who I hope was able to buy a really nice beach house with the blood money he made from this.

Hostel: Part III

It's always a mixed blessing when a horror movie franchise transitions from theatrical releases to direct-to-DVD ones. On one hand, it's nice--most of the time--to see series continue that otherwise couldn't, given the lackluster box office take of the last installment. On the other hand, the end result is almost always a letdown.

How big of a letdown depends on the intent of the filmmakers. Are they looking to make a good film or just keep the trademark alive for the studio? Generally speaking, I think the former is usually the case, although you look at something like what the Hellraiser series became, and it's easy to cynically start to believe the latter. Unfortunately, the economic realities of making a direct-to-DVD genre film means that even when intentions are good, the final product is not.

Hostel: Part III is, for the most part, a good film in the sense that it's competently made, seamlessly fits into the series in terms of both plot and visuals, and there are a couple of neat twists. Unfortunately, it also has a distinct lack of ambition and in at least one instance, the lack of any real budget turned what could have been a great scene into a terrible one.

Spoilers follow...

The decision to move the action from Slovakia to Las Vegas wasn't a terrible one, although I think they could have squeezed at least one more film out of the original setting. The problem with the story is that it doesn't build on the really interesting mythology of the first two films. While Hostel: Part II provided more detail about the Elite Hunting organization, Part III barely makes an effort. Sure, I guess it's nice to know they have an American branch, but aside from the tattoos, there isn't much of a connection. The bit where the audience wagers on the results of the torture sessions is more silly than anything else, and seems like a bit too much of a departure from the concept of Hostel: The wealthy paying to torture and kill people for fun. Simple yet brilliant.

The death scenes were surprisingly tame. Not that they needed to be especially elaborate, although I did get a kick out of the over-the-top stuff like the cannibalism and blood-bathing scenes in Part II. Maybe I'm just jaded, but someone getting his face sliced off just doesn't do anything for me. Unfortunately, the death scene with the most potential was evidently done in by not having enough money with which to film it properly: A girl has several (presumably carnivorous) insects poured over her, and all it results in is some horrendous CGI work as the insects improbably stream into her open mouth before a fade to black. Kind of disappointing for gore aficionados. After all, you can never go wrong with someone getting eaten alive.

Hopefully, there'll be a Hostel: Part IV. There aren't many horror franchises that still have so much material left to mine three films in, but there's still a lot of life left in this one. It'll be especially nice if the filmmakers concentrate more on the story than the death scenes, especially if they don't have the money to do them well.

Script: B-
Acting: B
Gore: B+
Overall: B

The Grand...Prize...Game!

For some reason, I recently found myself thinking about this old bit on The Bozo Show called The Grand Prize Game.

If you're under 25 and/or didn't spend most of your childhood in front of the TV and require some background, The Bozo Show was a daily children's television program produced in Chicago and aired on WGN. And since most cable companies around the country carry WGN--I've never actually been able to figure that one out. I guess I could probably find out just by going to Wikipedia, but it turns out I don't care as much as I thought I did a moment ago. So never mind--every child in America had access to Bozo.

I don't remember much about the show, to be honest. They did skits and ran cartoons and all the usual kids show crap, but really, the only reason I watched was for The Grand Prize Game.

It's probably easier to show than explain, so here you go.

Okay, maybe you didn't feel like sitting through that. So basically, the game is this: A kid was put in front of six buckets, all lined up in front of him. He was given a ball, which he attempted to toss into the first bucket, then another ball into the second bucket, and so on. For each bucket he could successfully toss a ball into, he got a prize. The prizes got better as the buckets got further away, and if he could get balls in all six buckets, he got a--as Bozo would say--"crisp, new $100 bill!" (I know in the clip above, the dude in the suit says it's $50, but that episode was filmed way before my time. By the late '80s, inflation had bumped it up to $100.)

I was obsessed with the game when I was a kid. Not because I wanted to play it. Just the opposite. I was constantly cringing while watching. It seemed like an amazing amount of pressure to put a child under. Think about it. You're a kid. You're on national television. You're being asked to do something that, on the face, seems incredibly simple, but is actually pretty damn hard, with $100 on the line. Which, when you're that age, may as well be $1,000,000.

And worst of all, there were no second chances.

The Grand Prize Game was a cruel motherfucker. I mean, Bozo wasn't a total dick, so if a kid was somehow stupid or uncoordinated enough to miss the first bucket, he'd let him have a do-over. But from the second bucket on, if the kid missed, that was it. For me, with my pampered, sheltered childhood, it was a bit of an eye-opener the first few times that Bozo didn't come over and say, "Oh, so close! What do you say, folks? Should we give him one more shot?" No. You were simply handed your shitty prizes, the name of your at-home-player was read (like you gave a shit some kid you'd never met was benefiting from your hard work), and you were quickly ushered off-stage.

And they always lost. I'm pretty sure most of them didn't even make it past the third bucket. I must have watched hundreds of Grand Prize Games, and I can only remember one kid actually getting all six buckets. That kid should have been treated like a rock star. You won't ever convince me that anything Justin Bieber does is harder than winning The Grand Prize Game.

I like to believe that every kid who lost, never forgot the burning anger and humiliation at being bested by a series of buckets and a TV clown, and were able to refocus that pain into becoming a success at whatever they put their mind to. I know that if it were me, that experience would have eaten at me every...single...fucking...day. All hyperbole aside, f I'd been one of those kids, I guarantee I would have cured cancer by now.

I keep reading about Millennials and their need for constant praise and affirmation in the workplace, because as kids, they were never allowed to experience failure or criticism. I know a couple of these people. I work with a couple of these people. They're terrible.

America needs The Grand Prize Game, and its harsh, yet true lesson that life isn't fair, so get the fuck over it. Now more than ever.

Quitting DC Comics

A question anyone who reads comic books well into adulthood is almost certain to encounter at some point is, "Why do you still read comic books?"

It's not really an easy question to answer. Entertainment, obviously, although that's been a matter of diminishing returns for a while now. Habit, too, I guess. I mean, it's hard to quit something you've been doing literally your entire life. One of my earliest childhood memories is sitting on my mom's lap as she used this to help teach me how to read.

But really, what it comes down to most is that I care about the characters.

I think that's true for most of the people who read comics. Certainly, I prefer to think that we're not reading just for rehashed fight scenes and often lame dialogue. It's to the credit to a lot of talented writers and artists over the years that they managed to take a truly absurd concept like superheroes and somehow create and maintain three-dimensional characters who, once a week, thousands of people across the country make the trek to their local comic book store to keep up with.

But as I was reading the DC relaunch books, I came to an unfortunate realization. These aren't my characters anymore. Some have gotten facelifts that are mostly cosmetic. Some have been completely reimagined. But regardless, across the board, it felt like I was reading the beginning of an entirely new comic book universe. And that's just not something I'm interested in doing. So I'm stopping. I'm no longer reading DC Comics. Even the titles I initially said I was going to keep up with. I got halfway through what was going to be a four week review of all the relaunch books, when I discovered I simply didn't give a damn. Aside from picking up the new The Unwritten and Morning Glories TPBs a couple of weeks ago, I haven't been in a comic book store in weeks. Honestly, it doesn't feel all that bad. If nothing else, I now have a lot more money for beer and cigars.

Just to be clear, this isn't me going all angry fanboy. Even if I don't agree with DC's decision, I understand the need for it. The comic book industry has been shedding readers for years. This relaunch was a calculated risk to pick up new customers, and no business can do that without alienating old ones. I just happen to fall into that latter category. That's okay. A lot of people seem to dig the new direction of the company. Good. I don't want to live in a world without comics featuring Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman. I just won't be following along any longer.

I'm also not completely turning my back on DC. They publish an awful lot of stuff I read through Vertigo. I'll still be buying Hitman TPBs and undoubtedly a lot more back catalogue stuff down the road. And honestly, I know myself well enough to know that I'll probably cave from time to time when it comes to the new DCU stuff. It's not like you can just flip a switch and no longer dig Batman, you know?

I quit reading DC once before when I was a teenager. It was 1993 or 1994 and almost everything the company was putting out was absolutely wretched. Then, a few years later, I was in a Target in Ohio of all places, and on a whim, I picked up one of those five-issue packs of comics that you used to be able to buy at places like Target or Toys R Us. They were five issues of Mark Waid's legendary run on The Flash. I poured through them, and was like, "Whoa! I didn't even know comics could be this awesome." So I started reading them again.

Maybe something like that will happen down the road and I'll once more become a fan. Stranger things have happened. But for now, I'm done.

Paranormal Activity 3

I wasn't going to see Paranormal Activity 3. I am, at best, a lukewarm fan of the franchise. And I thought the gimmick was already old by the first sequel. And I hate prequels. And I just wasn't in the mood to see a movie. And if I were going to see a movie last weekend, it probably would have been that Justin Timberlake movie where no one gets old and Olivia Wilde plays his mom, and wouldn't that be all kinds of weird, being in your 20s and having Olivia Wilde as your mom? At that point, isn't incest--or at least the thought of incest--a little understandable? I hope they address this situation in the movie.

But I digress. I wasn't going to see the movie, but then my electricity went out on Sunday morning, and by the time the early football games started, it didn't show any signs of coming back on. I didn't feel like going to the bar to watch the Redskins game, so I figured, what the hell, and went to the movie theater without even bothering to check the listings. When I got there, the next showing of In Time was in an hour. The next showing of Paranormal Activity 3 was in five minutes. So.

Spoilers follow...

I can't think of a film franchise that I care less about the mythology behind it than Paranormal Activity. I'm fine with the information that was provided/hinted at in the first two films as to why these two sisters seem to have such bad luck with houses and video cameras. But evidently, this is a story that needed to be told.

I love movies about haunted houses, because they're the only horror films that manage to unnerve me somewhat. I know I don't have to worry about vampires, zombies, hillbilly cannibals, or whatever. But ghosts? Who knows? Seems plausible. So to the extent I enjoy the Paranormal Activity films, it's because they're really good at producing spine-tingling moments like strange noises coming from seemingly empty rooms, or quick glimpses of shadowy figures, or little kids conversing with something we can't see.

The problem is, that's really all the Paranormal Activity films have going for them. Plotwise, there's very little that's interesting. And the logic of the entire franchise is dependent on the idea that someone's first impulse upon hearing a bloodcurdling scream or a loud crash, is to grab a video camera and start filming. I'm not going to defend Blair Witch 2 as a good movie, but at least the filmmakers were smart enough to abandon the first person POV rather than shoehorn it into a plot. I think I would have enjoyed Paranormal Activity 2 and 3 considerably more if they'd been built around the story of the first one, as opposed to its gimmick.

As for the big revelation at the end that the grandmother was part of a coven of witches who wanted to impregnate them or marry them to Toby the ghost or something...I guess it's creepy and all, but A) It was telegraphed horribly, from the moment the plot element was introduced in that book that conveniently turned up, B) Katie and Kristi seem a bit young for childbearing, so I'm not sure why the witches even wanted them, and C) It felt a bit like a ripoff of the ending of The Last Exorcism.

I have no doubt that this time next year, Paranormal Activity 4 will be in theaters. The second film ended with a cliffhanger, so hopefully they'll get around to resolving that instead of filling in plot holes no one cared about in the first place.

Script: C
Acting: B-
Gore: D-
Overall: C

Five Great Horror Movies You've Never Seen

Or maybe you have. I dunno. I always hate lists with titles like this because no matter how obscure the entries are, someone out there has to have seen them, right? It's basically just mental masturbation for the person making the list. Look how clever and informed about pop culture I am!

At the same time, I guess it sounds better than "Five Great Horror Movies You've Most Likely Never Seen," so whatever. Happy Halloween.


1) American Gothic (1987)

Because I've seen a lot of horror films, I know that when a friend suggests taking a weekend trip to any desolate location, the correct answer is, "Thanks, no." But if you do go, and encounter a house in the middle of nowhere, the second best thing you can do is to turn around and walk in the other direction, not accept the owner's offer of hospitality as you vaguely notice that your friends seem to be disappearing one by one. Sleep in your broken down car (or plane) if you have to, but get out! Of course, if people demonstrated that level of common sense, there would be no horror movie genre. So I guess their sacrifice is worth it.


2) Bloody Movie (aka Terror Night) (1987)

Bloody Movie a.k.a. Terror Night (1987) by bmoviebabe

Some people break into the supposedly abandoned mansion of an old silent film star. The surprise isn't that said silent film star is still living in the mansion and begins offing the intruders one by one, it's that he does it in insanely clever and creatively-filmed ways, looking to his filmography for inspiration.


3) Chopping Mall (1986)

When you're a teenager, sneaking into the local mall to party and have sex is, I guess, cool. When you're in your 20s, it's really just kind of sad. Don't worry, though, Most of these oversexed young adults won't be making it out alive, thanks to malfunctioning security robots that have claws and shoot lasers and whatnot. The guy who played the preppy kid on Head of the Class is the star, if that makes any difference.

(As far as horror movies set in malls go, this is a distant second to Dawn of the Dead, but considerably better than 1989's Phantom of the Mall: Eric's Revenge, starring Pauly Shore.)


4) Cannibal Holocaust (1980)

***Trailer NSFW***

Not for the faint of stomach, there were people back in the day who thought that the director had actually made a snuff film. He may as well have, because this is some pretty sick shit, as a group of American documentary filmmakers learn the hard way not to piss off cannibals.


5) Society (1989)

Celebrate both Halloween and Occupy Wall Street in one great film! A teenager from a wealthy California community discovers that his family and friends aren't what they appear. By that, I mean they get twisty and slimy and eat people. This isn't nearly as horrifying as what real rich people have done to this country, but what is?

DC Comics: The New 52 Reviews, Week 2

First week's reviews here

Batwoman #1

Goddammit, this is one gorgeous comic book. Seriously, if this issue consisted of nothing but J.H. Williams III drawing Batwoman reading the phone book, I suspect I'd have still enjoyed it. Luckily, there's a great plot to go along with it. Not that there's a great sample size so far, but between Williams and Greg Rucka, Batwoman's rogues gallery is really shaping up.

The weird thing about my liking this issue so much is that I'm not sure if I even like Batwoman. For one thing, there are too many Bat-people running around in the first place. For another, Kate Kane isn't always the easiest the character to like. But throw in a great story, Bette Kane as a resentful sidekick, and Chase, Mr. Bones and the DEO, and you have a comic I'm genuinely excited about.

Grade: A-


Deathstroke #1

I've always preferred Deathstroke as a mercenary more than a supervillain, as he's been portrayed in recent years. So apparent return to his pre-Johns portrayal was a nice surprise. I also like the concept of Slade Wilson being seen as over-the-hill, and having to prove to prospective employers that he still has it. (Speaking of, it seemed like there'd be a lot of fun in future issues, contrasting Deathstroke's old-school style to the group of young mercenaries gathered to back him up in the first issue. That's obviously not going to happen now, but "I think there is no 'up-and-coming.' There's only competition," was such a great line, I can live with it.)

I do hate the giant sword. It seems like something out of either an early Image comic or a Final Fantasy game, two of my least favorite things in the world. But other than that, great first issue.

Grade: B+


Grifter #1

This issue was a bit different for me in that Grifter is the only established character getting a new series that I have no familiarity with whatsoever. I mean, I know the name and the costume and everything, and have seen him pop up in the few Wildstorm series I used to read, but that's about it.

I'm not sure how much this version is a departure from the original, but I liked it. Most of the first issues that have come out so far have done a lackluster job at setting up the series in general and the next issue in particular. If nothing else, this isn't a problem Grifter suffers from. I'm genuinely interested in seeing what happens next.

Grade: B+


Suicide Squad #1

Last week I said Batgirl was DC's most controversial new series. Who knew Barbara Gordon walking again would be eclipsed by the online reaction to Amanda Waller going from fat to skinny?

Suicide Squad was one of the great series of the late '80s, a stand-out even among a lot of great series. Most of it can be credited to John Ostrander, who managed to give personalities to a bunch of supervillains who up until then had just been costumes. Other writers have tried to replicate Ostrander's success, but mostly failed. I'm not sure if Adam Glass will succeed, but I like what I've seen so far. This first issue is nothing groundbreaking, and you can see the twist coming a mile away. But it was a nice start.

All my problems with the issue are visual. Harley Quinn's new outfit? Awful. Deadshot's new costume? Terrible. (Seriously, I see why DC wanted to revamp some costumes, but pretty much all of them? Why?) As for Amanda Waller's new look...it's just dumb. In Ostrander's run, Waller was a poor, middle-age black woman who rose up from nothing to run a top secret government agency. That's undeniably cool. Here, she looks like a supermodel. Whether it's a costume or a waistline, change simply for the sake of change is almost always a bad idea.

Grade: B


Resurrection Man #1

I read a few issues of the original series back in the '90s, when DC was apparently greenlighting every single wacky idea for a series that they were pitched (what, there's no room for Major Bummer, Vext or Young Heroes in Love in the New 52?), but it never really did anything for me. This issue has me intrigued, though. I don't remember if the people (demons, entities, whatever) trying to kill Mitch were part of the original mythology, but either way, I like what Andy Lanning Dan Abnett came up with.

I'm less wild about the new and apparently much less fun costumes for the Body Doubles. But it's a minor complaint.

Grade: B


Demon Knights #1

This feels more like one of those old Elseworlds books where a bunch of characters with similar themes get tossed into a story together. Which is fine for a one-shot or mini-series, but are people really going to want to follow the historical adventures of the Demon, Madame Xanadu, Vandal Savage and the Shining Knight on an ongoing basis?

That's not to say I didn't like the first issue. But it feels like the Demon in name only. No rhyming. No mayhem. It's basically a medieval Incredible Hulk. I'll stick with it a bit, but add this to the list of new series that probably don't need to be.

Grade: B-


Superboy #1

I'm really not a Scott Lobdell fan, although more so for stupid things he's said in the past, as opposed to his writing. So I was predisposed to dislike this series. But I have to admit, I kind of dug it.

I've also never been a big fan of the character of Superboy. But a few years ago, DC hit upon a cool idea. Rather than just be a teenage clone of Superman, what if he was a clone made from the DNA of both Superman and Lex Luthor? As far as twists go, that's a pretty awesome one, and thankfully, it's one that Lobdell seems interested in exploring. Using Rose Wilson and Caitlin Fairchild in the supporting cast is also a pretty inspired choice. I'm surprised to say this, but I'm on board.

Grade: B-


Red Lantern #1

I've never been enthusiastic about the multiple Lantern Corps. For one storyline, sure. But having Blue Lanterns, Red Lanterns, Orange Lanterns, etc., dilutes what makes the Green Lantern Corps, one of my favorite comic book concepts, so special. But I went into this with an open mind, and there's some interesting stuff here. I'm not sure if Atrocitus is a character I really want to keep up with on a regular basis, but I do like the idea of someone with a Lantern's powers not interested in keeping order or instilling fear, but just getting revenge on bad guys.

In the very least, it's earned a second issue.

Grade: C+


Mister Terrific #1

I like Mister Terrific. He's one of the few characters created fairly recently who feels like he can credibly be considered a big gun of the DC Universe. That said, he works much, much better on a team book like JSA or Checkmate, because at the end of the day, he's basically a sci-fi version of Batman in terms of both secret identity (rich industrialist) and his motivation to fight crime due to personal tragedy (his wife being murdered). So I'm not sure how necessary this series is.

The new version doesn't really do the character any favors, either. His old costume, which has always been one of my favorites, has been replaced with an ugly sleeveless outfit. Since I really dug the issue of The Spectre where Holt was introduced, I'm not wild about the change to his origin, either, even though I can see why it was necessary. On the other hand, the new version appears to be banging Power Girl. So there's that.

Grade: C


Frankenstein, Agent of S.H.A.D.E. #1

It's a bit difficult to look at some of the great comics that were cancelled due to the relaunch--Zatanna, Secret Six, etc.--and not wonder how DC justifies replacing them with new series that, frankly, no one was clamoring for and have little chance of success. Frankenstein, Agent of S.H.A.D.E.? Maybe the poster child for this.

Last week, Jeff Lemire's work on Animal Man blew me away. Frankenstein isn't nearly as good, but you have to admire Lemire's ability to take lesser-known characters and do interesting stuff with them. I won't be buying the second issue, but I do like the book's ambition.

Grade: C-

Green Lantern #1
Batman & Robin #1

With these two books, we arrive at the biggest problem with DC's relaunch. Certain books, DC had no problem cancelling or rebooting. Which is fine. That's the whole point of starting over with all new first issues. But other books, because they sold well or because the writer was influential enough not to have their stories yanked out from under them, are being allowed to continue on as if nothing happened. Batman & Robin and Green Lantern are two such books.

It's easy to picture someone picking up these, thinking they were getting actual first issues, only to be surprised to learn that Batman has a son and that Hal Jordan is a deadbeat who's no longer Green Lantern, and that they were being dropped into a storyline halfway through with no idea what was going on. These aren't bad comics, but nor should they be called first issues.

Grade: C-


Legion Lost #1

I have, at best, a cursory knowledge of the Legion of Super-Heroes. Like the New Gods or the Silver Surfer, it's one of those concepts that I love, but have never quite been able to embrace when it comes to reading the actual comics. Every now and then, DC does some sort of big reboot/jumping-on point for new readers, and I give it a shot, only to lose interest before too long.

This issue may be a reboot, but it sure as hell isn't a jumping-on point. I was pretty much confused from start to finish. More to the point, I didn't really have much desire to try and figure it out, either. It also didn't help that my favorite Legionnaire apparently bites it in this issue.

Grade: D-

New 52 Report Card

Animal Man: A+
Batwoman: A-
Deathstroke: B+
Grifter: B+
Detective Comics: B+
Men of War: B
Suicide Squad: B
Resurrection Man: B
Demon Knights: B-
Hawk & Dove: B-
Superboy: B-
Red Lantern: C+
Swamp Thing: C
Batgirl: C
Static Shock: C
Justice League International: C
Mister Terrific: C
Justice League: C
Batwing: C-
Batman & Robin: C-
Frankenstein, Agent of S.H.A.D.E.: C-
Green Lantern: C-
Action Comics: D+
O.M.A.C.: D
Green Arrow: D
Legion Lost: D-
Stormwatch: F

Next week: Batman, Birds of Prey, Blue Beetle, Captain Atom, Catwoman, DC Universe Presents, Green Lantern Corps, Legion of Super-Heroes, Nightwing, Red Hood and the Outlaws, Supergirl and Wonder Woman.